The Bodians

Initially, she was interested in adopting a young child 3-6. After some research, she became concerned about her ability to handle the early trauma history of these little ones, and focused instead on adopting an infant. Two matches with a newborn fell through, almost to Ruth’s relief, and she decided to go back to her original plan.

In the fall of 2006, Ruth started attending the Department of Social Service’s MAPP (Massachusetts Approach to Partnerships in Parenting) training course to become a licensed adoptive parent. Half way through the classes, she went to a MARE Adoption Party at Jordan’s Furniture, not expecting to find a child she would adopt. She remembers seeing Jaron, then 11-years-old, and being immediately drawn to him. He had a gentleness to him and a kindness in his eyes that made Ruth want to find out more about him. Upon inquiring with his social worker, she found out that they shared the same birthday. A few weeks later, she saw Jaron on WBZ’s “Wednesday Child,” which confirmed for Ruth that Jaron was the child she wanted to adopt. He was also featured in Sunday’s Child on December 3, 2006.

Ruth was worried that there would be a flood of interest and she would not be chosen as a match. Luckily, she was, and visits between them began shortly afterwards. Though Jaron was older than the age she had been considering, this time it felt right. Ruth says, “Instead of focusing on my fears about parenting a pre-teen who had experienced trauma, I became focused on how I could be the best parent for Jaron that I could be. I reminded myself that I was well equipped to handle the challenges that might arise and could access outside support if I needed to.”

Jaron moved into his new home in February 2007. The first few months were a time of adjustment as Ruth and Jaron got to know each other better and transitioned to their new roles. As the celebratory period came to an end, the next few months became more difficult. Having gone through losses and disappointments in his life, Jaron tested Ruth’s commitment.
Ruth, who has an administrative position with the Boston Public Schools, realizes that challenging times are to be expected. “A greater concern would be if Jaron were always on his best behavior since that would mean he did not feel safe enough around me to share his less than charming side, which we all have.”

For Ruth, “The biggest rewards have come from making it through the rough times and becoming closer because of our ability to work through them together. We still have our challenging times, as any family, but we have learned how to navigate these times better.”
Jaron is now in the sixth grade at a middle school that provides a loving community for him. He is making tremendous academic gains and is playing sports, which he had always wanted to do. Jaron has made close friends in their neighborhood. He is truly thriving and happy in his new home.

When Ruth began thinking about adopting, she had focused on how her life would change as she took on the responsibility of becoming a mother. Ruth hadn’t realized how wide an impact the child would have. Extended family, friends and even strangers have been inspired by their story. “Jaron is very special and has touched many people with his warmth and kindness. I feel very proud and fortunate to call him my son”
Jaron showers equally kind words on his mom, “She is nice, friendly, sweet, kind, generous, loving, caring and respectful.” At a MARE reception at the State House in March 2008, Jaron told an audience with no dry eye in sight,“I love my mom. And I never thought I would be eating tofu.”