Adoptions brighten families' lives
Sunday, December 03, 2006
By BEA O'QUINN DEWBERRY
bdewberry@repub.com

Sallie and Gregory Schneider sat in their airy Longmeadow living room recalling the day they met Lucia, a Guatemalan toddler longing for love.

The dark-haired baby, with deep dimples and large brown eyes, wasn't the first child the couple had tried to adopt. But she is the best choice, the Schneiders said.

"There are so many kids out there that people don't want, and for me this was so life-changing and amazing to go to Guatemala and see so many kids in need and to know we have so much to offer them," Gregory Schneider, a business owner, said, as Lucia toddled about playing with brothers, Benjamin, 8, and Joseph, 9.

Despite the emotional highs and lows of a process that can take years to complete, and can range in cost from free to upward of $30,000, an increasing number of parents in the United States have chosen to adopt a child, whether from across the globe, or across the city.

According to the National Adoption Information Clearinghouse, six of 10 people nationwide are affected by adoption. With regard to adoption of children in the state Department of Social Services custody, about 50,000 foster children are adopted annually, up from 28,000 in 1996.

Robert D. Marmour, executive director of the Jewish Family Service of Western Massachusetts, said his agency, AdoptionLink, has broadened its services to meet the need.

AdoptionLink, a nonsectarian, nationally accredited private adoption agency, recently celebrated its 40th year.

"The myth is that there aren't enough children, but that's not true. There are more children than families and our mission is to find families for these children," Marmour said.

Marmour said that AdoptionLink fills a void left by Brightside for Families and Children, a West Springfield-based agency that closed its Adoption Resource Center last month. Brightside had served as a regional resource for children for 125 years.

Mark Fulco, vice president of marketing and strategy for the Sisters of Providence Health Systems, which operates Brightside, attributed the closing to a drop in the number of U.S.-born children being placed for adoption.

Those involved with adoptions say societal changes that include greater acceptance of single mothers, the legalization of abortion and broad use of birth control have reduced the number of unwanted children.

Brightside stopped handling international adoptions a few years ago. Citing religious grounds, the agency, a Catholic-based organization, has refused to handle gay adoptions.

"There was no longer a compelling community need for us to be providing a (domestic adoption) service," Fulco said.

Marmour disagreed.

"I refute the Sisters of Providence saying there's no demand for adoptions," Marmour said, noting that Brightside's closing has boosted his group's number of inquiries and clients. "In the last two weeks, our volume has increased six-fold. We attribute that to Brightside no longer taking in new families."

Marmour said they've made an agreement with Brightside to accept their transfer families, waive an application fee, and reduce rates for services.

AdoptionLink recently has hired Brightside's domestic adoption coordinator Jane Cohen, and it merged with Beacon Adoption Center of Great Barrington, hiring its former director, Deborah McCurdy. The Beacon Adoption Center, in business for 16 years, focused on international adoptions.

Susan L. Phillips, director of AdoptionLink, said international adoptions are often conducted with countries such as Guatemala, Ethiopia, China and some in Eastern Europe.

The adoption process includes home studies that can take six months to a year before a family even meets a child available for adoption.

"Bringing a child into one's life is as transforming as giving birth. We've seen so many placements that were meant to be," Phillips said.

Despite a string of obstacles and setbacks that would have discouraged many, the Schneiders' adoption of Lucia is one they consider as "meant to be."

Having given birth to two sons, Sallie wanted a daughter.

"I felt if I went the natural way, I'd have another boy and I also liked the idea of giving a child that didn't have a family a chance," Sallie said. Adoption "just seemed to fit."

The Schneiders began their search for a daughter in 2004. After a year into the process, the Bulgarian agency the Schneiders had been working with shut down, taking with it several thousands of dollars of the couple's money.

"I was thinking, 'Is God trying to tell us something?' because we seemed to be hitting so many roadblocks," Sallie said.

The couple turned to Guatemala in the summer of 2005. Even there, the couple ran into setbacks. They had been working with an orphanage that sent pictures of infant girls, including one they selected, named Sylvia.

When the Schneiders arrived at the orphanage, they learned that Sylvia had been transferred minutes earlier to another orphanage that did not sanction adoptions.

"We never really found out the real reason for that," Gregory said, adding that he later believed Sylvia's mother intervened.

With the help of a missionary group, the couple located Sylvia. After meeting the child, the couple decided they would pursue the adoption through the Guatemalan court system, a move suggested to them by an orphanage official.

Over a six-month period, the Schneiders argued their case, losing once, and again on appeal.

"We opted out in December," Gregory said. The Schneiders still did not give up their search for a daughter, however. They had been presented with the picture of Lucia, for a second time.

The first time, she was malnourished and sickly looking, Sallie said. Now, she was healthy and robust.

Within nine months and on her second birthday, Sept. 1, Lucia was adopted by the Schneiders.

The adoption of two sons by a Westfield couple, Irene and Daniel Provost, was quick and easy compared with the trials faced by some adoptive families.

Irene Provost, who was unable to conceive after years of treatments, had been visiting a girlfriend in Florida three years ago when a friend of her friend asked if she was interested in adopting a child. The woman knew of a woman six months pregnant who wanted to give up her child.

Daniel Provost recalled the moment his wife, an office manager at Westfield District Court, telephoned him from Florida. "It took about five minutes before we realized how wonderful this was," Daniel, a manager with the U.S. Postal Service, said. "Our experience was unique because we got our son within three to four months."

Daniel Provost said their son's biological mother had undergone tubal ligation surgery after the birth of their recently adopted son, Daniel, but "as fate would have it, 14 months later she got pregnant again with our son Alexander." Because the Provosts and Schneiders went through private agencies, costs were in the thousands of dollars. For eligible couples, a $10,600 tax credit offered by the federal government helps reduce the costs. The Provosts used their credit from adopting Daniel to adopt Alexander.

Massachusetts families who seek to adopt but don't have the financial means sometimes go through the Massachusetts Adoption Resource Exchange, which facilitates adoptions of children in foster care under the custody of the state Department of Social Services.

Unlike with private adoptions or international adoptions, adoption of children in foster care is free. Former foster children also receive tuition reimbursement at state colleges and universities, and medical coverage is available.

State adoptions involve children taken from families due to abuse, violence and neglect. As with private adoptions, state adoptions involve a home study. Families are also required to serve as foster parents for the child for at least six months prior to adoption.

Lisa Funaro, executive director of the Massachusetts Adoption Resource Exchange, said that last year 145 children in foster care were adopted. Funaro said that number has been consistent over the past 10 years.

"We have to educate the public that these kids are available," Funaro said. "Like any kid, they need love, security, a home and someone who is not going to give up on them," Funaro said.