The Somero Family

Both in their late 50’s, experienced parents Pauline and James Somero were unsure if they wanted to parent young children again. They relied on their faith to help lead them through the adoption process.

Pauline and James Somero have always had a room in their hearts for children. They raised seven biological children, who range in age from 25 to 40, and have 38 grandchildren. When they read the Sunday Globe, Pauline would say a prayer for the Sunday’s Child and hope he or she found a good home.

On April 18, 1999, they saw Star and Jason (formerly David) and were immediately struck by the siblings’ resemblance to their own children. They called MARE the next week and were directed to the children’s social worker.

A month later, they started the mandatory eight-week parenting course known as Massachusetts Approach to Partnership in Parenting (MAPP). The Someros had talked about doing foster care many years before, and had even started the training, but at the time they just didn’t have adequate space in the house. Seeing Star and Jason’s profile was the impetus they needed to restart the process.

Once the Someros’ social worker learned what led them to join the MAPP classes, she talked to the children’s social worker. They agreed the Someros were a good fit and broached the question whether they would consider adopting Star and Jason. The Someros discussed it with their family and friends who, while supportive, also expressed their concerns. The couple had their own worries, but decided to explore the possibility.

In late July of 1999, Pauline and James met with Star and Jason’s social worker; they left the meeting feeling uncertain whether they could handle the children’s needs. On their way home, however, the Someros drove by a billboard on a church that read, “God is in control.” James and Pauline took it as a confirmation to leave it in God’s hands the question of whether they could adopt.

The next month, the children’s social worker arranged for the Someros to have their first visit at the children’s foster home. Star, 12, and Jason, 9, were initially a little shy, but became more talkative later in the afternoon. They went out for lunch and then visited their school. On the way inside the school building, they saw the principal. Star introduced the Someros as “these wonderful people” who were adopting her and her brother and bringing them home. That did it for the Someros, and they never looked back.

The process went quickly from there. Star and Jason moved in just before the start of school. James, who was semi-retired from his family’s construction equipment business, was grateful for the opportunity to spend more time with his young family. Pauline, a stay-at-home mom, noticed that Star and Jason gravitated to the toys meant for a younger age group.
The children had to learn to be a part of a family. In foster care, Jason and Star had been in multiple homes – six before Star was 9 and then a long-term placement before they moved in with the Someros. They were behind their counterparts emotionally, as well as academically. Pauline and James had to remember the lessons from their MAPP classes; for one, to set boundaries and stick to them.

In the spring 2000, the adoptions became legal; and right before that time, Jason decided to change his first name to one he had always liked and take on his new father’s middle name for his own. Soon after, he started calling his parents “mom” and “dad,” and Star followed suit several months later, an unexpected but welcome surprise for the Someros.

Over the last several years, Star and Jason have received home schooling and have made incredible progress. They have matured into thoughtful, respectful adolescents who are active in their church and make friends easily. Star turned 18 in November 2004 and has a couple of years of catching up in school still to do, as does Jason, 14. Star loves children and wants to eventually work with them. According to the Someros, Jason is a hard worker and a hands-on learner. He is good in math and is already planning a career in construction. Where reading was once a struggle, both Star and Jason now love to read.

Despite the challenges, the Someros say “We did not lose a night’s sleep over Star and Jason,” as they had expected, especially during the adjustment period. They have prayed a lot and believe God was instrumental in bringing and keeping their family together. James and Pauline are more appreciative of what they have in their own lives since learning from their children what it is like to be without.